They say that good karma is rewarded, they say that crime does not pay, they say that good wins over evil, that being good is a good thing, but just who is it truly good for?
In life often the good just suffer or have to suffer and put up with the actions of others. They have to accept the unacceptable, forgive the unforgivable and say it’s alright, it’s excusable. They have to be the ones to keep building the bridges over the troubled waters, their hearts have to feel the pain that others do not always feel in their unconcious state of destructive and selfish behaviour. Meanwhile, the others that cause unrest never learn because they are constantly forgiven.
They move on with their lives often oblivious to the pain they cause others, or they simply do not care, nor are taught to care. The world we live in does not seem to teach this to any great effect, they often get away with their behaviour through loop holes, conveniences of excuse or contributions that pay a toll to apease.
How can any logical minded human being feel that following a path of righteousness has any benefits if this world does not reward those that are? There is a lot to be said for the ease of concience but those without concience do not carry the burdens that working against it weigh. Again that is left for the righteous.
The good soul steps out into the world and is met often with punishments and suffering when they have never hurt anyone in their lives nor had bad intentions. They care, they love, they give, they hope, but why should they continue to accept? Why can things not be the other way round, where the choice is not to accept and instead insist that others have to admit their wrongdoing and make change. For years this world has worked on this prinicpal of forgiveness and acceptance, but what about tough love? Does that theory not actually show proven results?
On a personal level as, I think, a relatively good soul, I have reached a stage where I am tired of accepting this is just the way things are, tired of forgiving people for hurting me and being wrong, I am tired of being the one that always walks up to the troubled water and starts to build the bridge because it is the “right thing to do”, because I should “be the bigger person”, why should I be the bigger person?
They say you should not give to receive, but in the same vain they say, do things that are good and good things will come your way. They say do unto others as you wish for yourself, but this means give of yourself and expect the same in return even if it is not from that person directly. So even if we try to say we are giving unconditionally, truly everything has some form of internal dialogue of condition going on and deep down we really are hoping for something in return. Really all most of us want in return is love.
So where does that leave being good? In between a rock and hard place, because as a soul your concience cannot allow you to be inherently bad otherwise your mind will not rest. In the meantime you have to find a way to live in this world where your tender heart can survive. You have to love yourself as much as possible because most other people don’t really love you and won’t love you because you are not like them.
You have to just keep hoping that someday this life will bring you things that will truly warm your heart and make you feel that the suffering has been worthwhile, that there is a God afterall, that being good does win, that karma is returned to you in this life, where it is relevant to this current experience of being.